As a former swinger (with an ex-boyfriend), I just took the huge step of venturing back into the lifestyle this past weekend. But, I lacked the confidence I used to have.
Being there by myself was very strange and new. I am usually quite flirtatious, but found myself out of my comfort zone.
How do you single women express your interest in a guy you have never met before, at a swing club or swingers’ party?
Parties will now be held in the area where I live, and I want to handle it better than I did this past weekend.
If there are no ice-breaker games, and everyone is left to their own devices, what approach has worked for you?
I know it sound like I never did before… but at my time, (many years ago) we used to go to house parties and everybody know everyone there, so that was easy… Continue reading...
Often befriending couples is the easiest way into a social group. They are usually the most open and receptive to approach (they can be quite a lot of fun too) and often couples know everyone in the club or at the house party. Continue reading...
I think its all about the confidence, if you see someone you like then what difference is there if a single male, couple or a group.
How would you approach a single male? You would smile, make eye contact, flirt – apply the same rules to to a swinging situation.
If you look uncomfortable the chances are no one will approach you. Perhaps use a little
self psychological trickery and see it as any other social outing. Meeting new friends and take it from there. Continue reading...
I agree wit the above posters. Treat it as any other social gathering and relax and enjoy.
When my friend and I go to a club, he often leaves me at the door and parks the car. By the time he gets in, or if we have separated for a few minutes, I have usually found someone to talk to. Continue reading...
I actually had two good female friends who used me as their “anchor” of sorts for meets, parties and more…..
I am not the person to get to wrapped up in the party itself but more the voyeur action it worked for me! Continue reading...
Thanks everyone, for your great advice. This has just reminded me what worked best when I was part of a couple.
Go with an open mind, chat with lots of people, be friendly and flirtatious, and “go with the flow”.
I needed the reminder that, I was not going to the club to “get lucky”, just to make contacts and enjoy the people and surroundings – with no pressure that anything might happen.
The difference was that I loved what happened after the party… and I loved that. I had forgotten that.
Fortunately, I know the couple who are hosting. And going home alone from this event, even if I do not make a real connection with anyone, will be no different than what happens after any “vanilla” event I go to, any other night of my life. C’est la vie.
I had forgotten that it not a reflection on what kind of a person I am. I guess I just needed some thoughtful advice from the people on this Advice Line to remind me of that. Continue reading...
As our user name say, cumon over to us and we will help you get back to the lifestyle.
However if you decide to do it alone, then just be yourself and as soon you will be comfortable with people around you the rest will happen… Continue reading...
I too have not felt very comfortable at either a swingers party or adult club.
But if I did see someone interesting, I might smile, say hello. If interest was returned I might ask if they’d like to chat a bit with me. Much like any normal situation I suppose! Continue reading...